Marketing

Some of you have asked for help with the Marketing exam on Friday. Perhaps the following analogies will help:

• Direct Marketing: You see a handsome guy at a party. You go up to him and say, "I'm fantastic in bed."

• Advertising: You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a handsome guy. One of your friends goes up to him and pointing at you says, "She's fantastic in bed."

• Telemarketing: You see a handsome guy at a party. You go up to him, and get his telephone number. The next day you call and say, "Hi, I'm fantastic in bed."

• Public Relations: You're at a party and see a handsome guy. You get up and straighten your dress. You walk up to him and pour him a drink. You say, "May I," and reach up to straighten his tie brushing your breast lightly against his arm, and then say, "By the way, I'm fantastic in bed."

• Brand Recognition: You're at a party and see a handsome guy. He walks up to you and says, "I hear you're fantastic in bed."

• Sales Rep: You're at a party and see a handsome guy. You talk him into going home with your friend.

• Tech Support: Your friend can't satisfy him so he calls you.

• Spam: You're on your way to a party when you realise that there could be handsome men in all these houses you're passing. So you climb onto the roof of one situated toward the centre and shout at the top of your lungs, "I'm fantastic in bed!"