The difference between men and women

 

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A man will pay $2 for a $1 item if he wants it.
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't want because it's on sale.

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find that man.

To be happy with a man you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman you must love her a lot and don't expect to understand her at all.

Married men live longer than single men,
but married men are a lot more willing to die.

Any married man can forget his past mistakes;
there's no reason for two people to keep track of the same things.

A woman marries a man expecting him to change, and he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting her not to change and she does.

A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.